I come downstairs to find a stranger in my house. He is uninvited. He stands in the kitchen, poking through my cabinets.

“Information wants to be free, you know,” he says. He picks up my wallet, weighs it in one hand.

“This is a service,” he says, slipping a crisp dollar bill from inside and sliding it in his pocket. “For the poor. You understand.”

He takes another dollar. And then one more. But only that much. “What’s unfortunate,” he says, opening the fridge, “is that we have a system that makes this necessary.”

He selects a beer. I, of course, do not drink, but I say, “that’s for guests.”

“So you’re going to take their side?” He says. “You’re only helping the corporations.” He opens my beer. He drinks it.

“Who are you?”

“You know what your problem is,” he says. “You’re selfish. Greedy, even.” He opens a box of cereal from the cabinet, pours some in a mug.

“Do you ever ask for things?” I say. It’s all I can muster at the moment. I’m confused. Angry.

“Oh, you’re angry now?” He dumps the cereal in the trash. “I’ve been doing this for years, and you’re angry only now, when you’ve noticed? Typical.”

“Get out!” I open the door for him.

He shakes his head. “This could have been a revolution. Now see what you’ve done.”

As he leaves, he slides his hand into my pocket and pulls out a fresh, new ballpoint pen. “Thanks for nothing, asshole.”